Photo by Nastacia Kvariani: https://www.pexels.com/photo/a-blurry-photo-of-a-woman-3042772/
Something that I have struggled with my whole life is negative self worth. Only believing negative things about myself, not allowing myself to believe all the good things God says I am in His word, beating myself up with my internal dialogue. And I wouldn't be surprised if you have had a similar season. Experiencing negative thoughts about yourself is so common, with social media's expectations and comparison to others all being apart of our daily life.
When I first opened up about this with a trusted friend, she said that in my negative self thoughts, I was saying God was wrong, and I was idolising myself instead of Him.
Woah.
This is actually so true. If we are talking negatively to and about yourself, you are criticising God for how He has made you, saying that He could've done better (which - newsflash - He couldn't). Plus, you are actually saying these negative thoughts about God Himself, since we are all made in His image (Gen 1:27).
But in this space, hearing this probably isn't the best. It led to me beating myself up more and spiralling down into more negative self thoughts and self sabotaging behaviours. I sort of forgot about it for a while, thinking because it was only harming me, it was ok. Until my pastor and mentor brought it up again the last time I caught up with her. She analysed what was going on in my life, and she said that so much of my live's struggles and what I was going through could be attributed to my negative self worth. Her affirmation in my life communicating to me that I don't deserve to treat myself like this (even though I debated with her on this) caused me to take a real good look at this and tackle it head on.
And trust me, I am far from being done. I am still struggling so much with self worth issues, but have received a few goodies from God which I want to share with you;
Self worth and self esteem IS NOT THE SAME THING
Self esteem is what we place on ourself, what we believe about ourself. It fluctuates with our feelings, never being stable, reliant on our life and what's going on.
However, self worth is stable, never changing. It is what God says we are, which is stone hard truth, it's not budging. No matter what you say or do, you always have self worth in God.
So, really, our problem isn't our self worth, but our belief that it's real. This perspective shift really helped me to heal from the damage this has had in my life.
2. We get our self worth from GOD alone.
Our self esteem can come from all sorts of places, but our true self worth can't. Our self worth is for the Creator to define, because He created us and therefore knows us the most intimately (even better than ourselves)!
So obviously, we find out what our worth is from the One who made us - and how we communicate with Him is through His word and prayer. I was listening to a podcast on the topic of self worth for Christians (I'll link it below), and they were saying Ephesians is one of the best books to find out what your self worth is in Jesus. I'm currently going through this book, and writing down everything it says I am, good or bad, which has really been helping!
Also prayer is a huge way we can find out our worth. Spending dedicated time with God, asking Him who we are, is so important to the growth of our faith.
3. When we don't believe it, others do for us.
Just like my mentor and others in my life have for me, there will be people in your life who can see your self worth when you can't. When we are so stuck in our negative thinking about ourself, we are blinded to the real truth. We have thought this same way for so long, we can't see another option.
This is why input from godly people is so important in our lives! I have definitely noticed a difference in my overall wellbeing when I have good, godly people around me compared to not.
I highly encourage you to identify those people in your life, whether that be a pastor, leader, or trusted friend, and invite them into this space in your life. When you let them see what you are battling on the inside, they can help fight the battle for you and believe in faith on your behalf when you can't.
What are other ways you have been able to fight these negative thoughts about yourself? Put them in the comments - I would love to hear them!
PODCAST MENTIONED: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3olS0dLlncYiYIygdqDCju?si=c6c2a209574e495b
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